What we feel is what we feel, and often it can be contrary to our wishes; the best thing we can do, is to be honest with ourselves, and true with our actions.
Sometimes, we do things and don't really get, how naive those actions are; it's a good thing, that people believe we understood our actions, all along.
Life can seem to be rather easy to plan out and schedule; but, in practice, you may find it full of unexpected cancellations, revisions, and additional amendments.
You may not have the answers to address how you feel; but, you have every right to express them, so that, someone can hear them, and possibly understand.